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Ouch! How to Handle Hurtful Words Like a Pro (Without Losing Your Cool)
Because sometimes, biting back isn’t the best option
Everyone’s been hurt by words — whether from strangers, colleagues, loved ones, or even an honest but oblivious kid. Harsh comments, especially those about our appearance, abilities, or relationships, can sting deep. How should we react? While tears, anger, or silence might be instinctive, these responses rarely lead to understanding, and they often leave us feeling worse. So, what’s the best way to handle hurtful remarks?
Take a Beat — Don’t Bite Back (Yet)
The urge to snap back when stung is almost universal. But according to communication expert Matt Abrahams of Stanford University, the best response starts with a pause. “It’s common to have an emotional reaction and want to respond immediately,” he explains. “But giving yourself a little space can help you focus your thoughts.”
When you pause, it’s not about ignoring the insult but creating a moment to control your reaction. In that instant, you gain power over your emotions rather than letting them control you. This pause allows you to avoid impulsive reactions — ones you might regret later.
Now that you’ve taken a breath, let’s explore the power of…